Overcoming post-holiday nursing strike | Holiday breast refusal
Read time | 6 minutes
The holiday season is one of the most stressful times of the year.
For many, it will single-handedly be THE MOST stressful part of their year.
It's so stressful that the American Psychology Association has a whole section of their site (called the Holiday Stress Resource Center) dedicated to providing tips for minimizing & avoiding stressors.
Despite being unable to partake in the political discussions or family drama that inevitably take place every time your family gets together, and thus dampens the holiday-cheer, your baby too may find this season incredibly overwhelming.
Need to brush up on Thanksgiving Clapbacks? Check out this video! or this one!
As a result, your baby, who up 'till now has breastfed without a problem, may have started to seem incredibly fussy at the breast. Or worse, they may be completely refusing to nurse at all.
The phenomenon, called a 'nursing strike,' is not a particularly uncommon response to the over-stimulation or disruptions in routine the holiday season can cause, but is both distressing and exhausting for parents.
Similar to what you may be experiencing, many parents report feeling confused, hopeless, helpless, emotionally/mentally/physically tired, and feeling as though their baby hates the breast/breastfeeding when they navigate a nursing strike.
I've got some news that will hopefully provide some reassurance:
If your baby is currently refusing the breast and is under 18-24 months old, the odds are extremely low that they're trying to wean. Additionally, nursing strikes generally only last for a few days to a couple of weeks, and they can be shortened significantly by understanding what is causing/has caused the nursing strike to begin with.
Why might the holidays cause a nursing strike?
The holidays, by nature of how we celebrate, create a combination of circumstances that drastically increases the likelihood of a nursing strike for the following reasons:
Stress, over-stimulation, and chaos during holiday prep, family gatherings, festivities
Frequent interruptions while nursing or timing of feeds to work around family activities, cooking, etc
Significant routine changes as a result of traveling, outings, time zone/environment change
Arguments or yelling during breastfeeding, be it from you or those around you
Unusually long separations (baby hot potato or night at Grandma's anyone?)
Even just one of the aforementioned environmental disruptors could lead to a nursing strike, yet most of us experience more than one during the holiday season.
Non-Negotiables during the nursing strike
The first and foremost thing you MUST do as soon as you notice your baby regularly refusing the breast is to start expressing. The frequent expression will protect your supply and breast health through the duration of the strike.
The method you choose to remove your milk is entirely up to you- many parents use a double electric pump, while others may prefer to use a hand up or hand express- but the frequency should correlate with every missed feeding.
Secondly, when all possible, avoid bottles and pacifiers. Doing so, however inconvenient it may be, especially on top of the pumping, will decrease the duration of the strike. Forgoing both bottle teats and pacifiers will avoid satisfying your baby's sucking urge, which will encourage them to seek the breast to fulfill that need.
Skipping bottles means using an alternative feeding method, such as an open cup, spoon, or syringe, depending on your baby's age. You can read about the available alternatives here.
Please note that at-the-breast feeders mentioned in my post aren't an appropriate alternative feeding device in this case.
Strategies for ending a nursing strike
If it occurs while you're away from home
If a nursing strike begins while you're away visiting family or friends, it may be more challenging to resolve a nursing strike before returning home. The disruption in routine, the chaos of family activities, overstimulation, or frequent interruptions may not end until your back in the comfort of your own home.
Things you can try include
Babywearing as often and for as long as baby desires. If you are comfortable going braless under your shirt, that can be helpful
Reduce/eliminate passing baby around to family members/friends
Attempt feedings in a dark, quiet room away from everyone
Co-bathe with no expectations of baby latching- enjoy the skin to skin and bonding time with your baby. Do as often as you can.
Offer the breast while your baby is in light sleep or in a drowsy state.
If it occurs or continues while you're at home
In addition to the strategies mentioned above you can also try
babywearing topless and braless
taking a "babymoon"- Untinerrupted 2-day weekend of unlimited skin to skin and reconnection
The key to resolving a nursing strike seems almost impossible and counter-intuitive, but it's true- The LESS STRESSED you are about whether or not they nurse when you offer the MORE LIKELY they will be to take the breast.
It can be helpful before doing any of these activities, to make sure you take time out to mentally prepare and release any expectations. Sometimes, especially if your babe is particularly sensitive, it may take weeks before your baby is back to breastfeeding without an issue.
With that said, if your baby's breast refusal lasts more than a few days to a week, make an appointment with your care provider to rule out any physical causes of the nursing strike. Sometimes pain or illness can lead to babies refusing the breast, which would require a doctor visit to rule out.
If your provider gives your babe a clean bill of health and the strategies above don't resolve the strike, please contact a lactation professional to help identify or rule out other possible causes of breast refusal.
The holiday season is super stressful, and dealing with a nursing strike is arguably more so, but you know a great way to destress?
MEMES.
And there is no shortage of them (along with excellent breastfeeding information) on my Facebook page. If you're not following me already, you're missing out!!
Dealt with and overcome a nursing strike? Please share your experiences below!