A couple of years ago parents heard a phrase that resonated deeply with them, and since then it has turned into THE support motto.

When parents publicly voice their struggles with human milk feeding, the gentle, sympathetic reminder that "fed is best" provides some comfort during these stressful, often overwhelming times.

When parents mention their choice or need to formula feed, the masses chime in to provide reassurance that "fed is best" which serves to assuage any potential "mom guilt" they may feel, or that may be thrust upon them by lactation advocates.

"Fed is best" has become the term to unify the once divided "sides" of the infant feeding debate. It is the answer that parents NEEDED to hear after years and years of hearing that "breast is best."

It's catchy, it's based in truth, and it provides something that breastfeeding and lactation advocates just cannot: A middle ground that ensures nobody feels attacked or judged for their choices.

As human milk feeding supporters have tried to refocus the conversation on human milk being the optimal food source for infants, it's only given the Fed is Best foundation (FiB) the ammunition it needs to continue to diminish and undermine lactation professionals, advocates, and anyone who wants to highlight human milk as the ideal food for human babies.

It may come as a surprise to you, but as a lactation professional, I believe that "fed is best." I feel that unfed, underfed, and starving babies is the worst situation imaginable and that it must be avoided at all costs.

Despite my support for the promotion of human milk as the optimal food source, and though I strive to normalize human milk feeding (both at breast/chest and via bottle), THE MOST important thing to me is that babies aren't starving or dying due to lack of intake.

And despite the way FiB portrays the lactation profession, I have yet to meet a single person who feels that fed is NOT best; that the cause of human milk feeding is SO important to them that babies MUST ONLY be human milk-fed or else they must starve.

Somewhere along the way, however, we as lactation professionals have created an environment that has allowed the Fed is Best organization to thrive, and many are unknowingly pushing parents right into the FiB camp.

(I've been very vocal about my opinion on Lactation professionals failing parents. I will leave my video about this here for you to view in case anyone want's to argue that I am skirting the issue that there are incidents of poor lactation care. Today's blog is not about that.)

After thinking long and hard about how to best address the topic of the Fed is Best organization, it occurred to me that it's a battle we will never win.

My goal with this blog post is to present a few reasons why I think this is a losing battle.

Some background information

Most of you reading this may only be familiar with the phrase "fed is best," but the FiB foundation is a non-profit organization that is comprised of health professionals and volunteers whose mission is to:

Identify gaps in current breastfeeding protocols, guidelines, and education programs, and provide families and health professionals with the most up-to-date scientific research, education, and resources to practice safe infant feeding with breast milk, formula, or a combination of both.

The organization was started after one of its founders struggled with unidentified, insufficient exclusive breastfeeding that resulted in her baby needing to be hospitalized.

It's is a sad story and one that I hope nobody else has to go through. Her desire to create an organization that prevents that from happening to anyone else is quite commendable.

But as much as I WANT to like the organization and what it stands for, it accomplishes its mission by building a foundation of distrust of human milk feeding and lactation professionals alike.

Which brings to me to my first point as to why we will never win against FiB.

They promote distrust in human milk feeding while Lactation professionals aim to build confidence in our bodies ability to human milk feed.

Fear-based marketing, which is the basis of most of their marketing materials, has proven to be one of the best marketing strategies and is effective in motivating people to take action.

Their marketing tactics, which targets new parents who tend to already have doubts and concerns regarding human milk feeding and infant behavior, are aimed at providing answers and solutions to the most acute pain point many parents have: Is my baby getting enough?

The tricky thing about FiB is that they don't overtly say "don't trust your body," but their messages are apparent. Here are three breastfeeding tip graphics from their website compared to graphics I've created that have the same underlying message but are presented in two very different ways.

When it comes to infant feeding, in the battle between trust and distrust, distrust always wins. Reading a quick synopsis of the history of formula marketing will show how true that is.

Unlike formula company marketing, however, they create the illusion that they and lactation professionals have the same goals: Promote safe human milk feeding.

They are pros at preemptive gaslighting.

If there is one thing that I am jealous of, besides at how pervasive their message is, it's whoever is in charge of their marketing. They are great at their job.

Not only is their branding great, but the people writing for FiB are master gaslighters. If you're unfamiliar with what gaslighting is, it's a term used to describe psychological manipulation to make others question their own sanity.

This tactic is not geared towards parents. Parents only hear that "fed is best" and "we are here to support you on your feeding journey and support your choices." The lactation profession, however, is left feeling trapped in a logical maze where we feel forced to talk about how subversive their message is all the while trying not to come off as "Crazy Lactivists."

One prime example is their latest blog post titled "I was able to breastfeed my third baby thanks the fed is best foundation."

The blog is written by a parent who shares their experience on how the fed is best foundation played a pivotal role in her breastfeeding success.

I love it.

Anytime a parent receives the support they need to reach their goals, I am happy. And in case it needs to be said, I am not questioning her experiences and trying to say that FiB was unhelpful.

But after reading the post, I can't help but to think what purpose do they have for sharing that. Yes, it's to promote the FiB foundation, any good business has testimonials, but is there another underlying message that readers are getting that they are not aware of?

As I read the post, I thought to myself, “there is nothing in that blog post that a well trained, compassionate lactation professional wouldn't do or suggest, yet I see no mention of lactation professionals and no encouragement to those struggling to seek lactation support.”

FiB and Lactation professionals are not in direct competition; remember we supposedly have the same goal. Those who have breastfeeding difficulties should be pointed to lactation professionals, in the same way, someone needing medical help would be referred to doctors or those needing emotional support therapist, right?

So why then is there a lack of mentioning the lactation profession, which comprises of people with a wide range of certifications, and is generally considered adept at handling a wide range of infant feeding challenges regardless of how or what they're fed?

And the fact that I even have to question the motives behind this breastfeeding success story is absurd!

But alas, should any lactation professional or breastfeeding advocate talk about the lack of mention of our skill set in this post or similar posts, we face potentially being seen as complainers or not supportive of their success at supporting human milk feeding families.

The longer we sit with if it's worth mentioning or not, the less credible we sound in our own mind.

That, my friends, is nuanced gaslighting at it's finest, perfectly woven into a powerful testimonial.

The burden is on us to prove human milk is best for human babies

It's incredible that there is still any question (or that there was ever any question) that human milk is tailor-made to grow human babies. I don't know of any other mammalian milk that is doubted and questioned to the extent human milk is.

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We trust our milk so little that we think other animals, mainly cows, or an industry that tries to replicate human milk as closely as they can, is better able to meet the needs of our babies.

And there seems to be those who avidly support the FiB campaign that still request that we provide evidence to support our claims.

That somehow, despite hundreds of thousands of years of our milk and feeding capabilities being suitable for growing and sustaining a population, parents today are producing insufficient and inadequate milk.

Why are we being asked to present data to support our claims that there are "benefits" to human milk feeding for babies whose parents live in industrialized countries? This is in spite of the fact that the "benefits" of human milk are generally widely accepted because it's the norm for which we should expect.

I hope I don't have to put more energy in to having to explain why human milk is ideal for human babies. The issue is not a lack of evidence, its a lack of trust or willingness to accept the evidence that is out there that’s the issue.

Moreover, we are being asked to ignore our level of understanding of the physiology of human milk production, the impacts lactation has on maternal health, barriers that interfere with the success of reaching breastfeeding goals, and the skills we learn to help support families in a wide range of situations — asked to just shut up and agree that human milk feeding is inherently flawed for so many parents that not only should early supplementation be suggested frequently but that a whole organization needs to be created in addition to the field already tasked with addressing those issues.

Though FiB has a point in that early lactation support is essential and needs to be improved, the issue shouldn’t be with the lactation profession or healthcare advocates who promote human milk feeding.

They outright lie.

It's hard to compete with an organization which lies to help further their cause. I don't like to accuse people of lying, but it would appear there is no other term for it.

To keep it short and straightforward, and to let you decide what you deem as being dishonest, I will provide you with a bit of evidence.

It seems that FiB has deleted the information in question, so let me give you a bit of background information.

FiB published a list of Baby Friendly Hospitals that supposedly relinquished their BFHI status.

(FiB has a bone to pick with baby-friendly hospitals by the way, which get the designation after a lot of hard work in making breastfeeding facilitation a significant part of their care)

Though their page is gone, here is the list of hospitals they claim GAVE UP their BFHI status.

HOSPITALS THAT HAVE RELINQUISHED THEIR BABY-FRIENDLY STATUS SINCE 2016

Data comparing list from 2016 to September 2018

Adventist Healthcare Shady Grove Medical Center, Rockville, MD
Alice Peck Day Memorial Hospital, Lebanon, NH
AnMed Health Women’s and Children’s Hospital, Anderson, SC
Bridgton Hospital, Bridgton, ME
Castle Medical Center, Kailua, HI
CentraState Medical Center, Freehold, NJ
Feather River Hospital, Paradise, CA
IU Health Goshen Hospital, Goshen, IN
Kaiser Permanente Baldwin Park Medical Center, Baldwin Park, CA
Kaiser Permanente Downey Medical Center, Downey, CA
Kaiser Permanente Fontana Medical Center, Fontana, CA
Kaiser Permanente Los Angeles, Los Angeles, CA
Kaiser Permanente Moanalua Medical Center, Honolulu, HI
Kaiser Permanente Panorama City Medical Center, Panorama City, CA
Kaiser Permanente Riverside medical Center, Riverside, CA
Kaiser Permanente San Diego, San Diego, CA
Kaiser Permanente South Bay medical Center, Harbor City, CA
Kaiser Permanente South Sacramento Medical Center, Sacramento, CA
Kaiser Permanente Sunnyside Medical Center, Clackamas, OR
Kaiser Permanente West Los Angeles, Los Angeles, CA
Kaiser Permanente Woodland Hills Medical Center, Woodland Hills, CA
Kishwaukee Community Hospital, DeKalb, IL
Lodi Memorial Hospital, Lodi, CA
Mayo Clinic Health System- Austin, Austin, MN
Mayo Clinic Health System- Franciscan Healthcare, La Crosse, WI
Mercy Hospital Anderson, Cincinnati, OH
Mercy Hospital Fairfield Hospital, Fairfield, OH
North Carolina Women’s Hospital, Chapel Hill, NC
Pacific Alliance medical Center, Los Angeles, CA
Pekin Hospital, Pekin, IL
Pinnacle Health-Harrisburg Hospital, Harrisburg, PA
Providence Alaska Medical Center, Anchorage, AK
Providence Hood River Memorial Hospital, Hood River, OR
Providence Hospital, Washington, DC
Reading Birth and Women’s Center, Reading, PA
Regional Health Services of Howard County, Cresco, IA
Rockford Memorial Hospital, Rockford, IL
Rosebud Indian Health Service Hospital, Rosebud, SD
Simi Valley Hospital, Simi Valley, CA
Southview Hospital, Dayton, OH
St. Francis Eastside, Greenville, SC
St. John Providence Hospital-Southfield, Southfield, MI
St. John Providence Park Hospital Novi, Novi, MI
St. John’s Hospital, Maplewood, MN
St. Joseph’s Hospital, St. Paul, MN
St. Mary’s Hospital for Women and Children, Evansville, IN
Texas Health Arlington Memorial Hospital, Arlington, TX
Texas Health Harris Methodist Hospital Cleburne, Cleburne, TX
Texas Health Harris Methodist Hospital HEB, Beford, TX
Texas Health Harris Methodist Hospital Stephenville, Stephenville, TX
Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Allen, Allen, TX
Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Dallas, Dallas, TX
Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Denton, Denton, TX
Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Plano, Plano, TX
UVA Culpeper Hospital, Culpeper, VA
Winthrop-University Hospital, Mineola, NY

The issue lies in the fact many of these hospitals did not give up their status, but rather, shut down, switched names, or even burned down.

Receipts, sis!

Simi Valley Hospital is now Adventist Health Simi Valley, which does, in fact, have the BFHI designation.

Pacific Alliance Medical Center in Los Angeles shut down.

Lodi Memorial Hospital now Adventist Health Lodi Memorial, which does have the BFHI

Feather river health center in Paradise Ca burned down in a fire and is currently not operational.

Now like I mentioned, they have since deleted that list but here is the hyperlink from their site to where the page used to exist.

https://fedisbest.org/information-for-hospitals-ensuring-safety-for-breastfed-newborns/hospitals-that-have-relinquished-their-baby-friendly-status-since-2016/

Additionally, here is the response from Baby-Friendly USA about the falsehoods of their reporting.

An honest, professional industry has no chance against a foundation that's not above outright lying.

Clearing up facts that FiB purposefully misrepresents is a challenge enough, but I can’t stand or deal with liars. .

So what does this mean?

The public, lactation professionals and health care providers must understand that the reason why FiB is so effective is that families are being failed.

There are legit barriers in place that make it hard for ALL families to get the lactation support they need, which put babies at risk.

Some obstacles pose a hindrance to families' human milk feeding goals which put babies at risk.

There are political, cultural, racial, and socio-economical factors that contribute to difficulties families have with human milk feeding that as long as they continue to be ignored, will continue to put babies at risk.

What FiB is essentially providing, and what the public I feel is asking for, is more proactive lactation guidance.

I believe that while we will never win against the FiB foundation, if there is even a consideration that a fight or war is being had, the best thing we can continue the fight to elevate the lactation field.

We need to continue to voice the fact that there are significant barriers for those seeking to become an IBCLC, that hospitals often don't have sufficient lactation professionals on staff to support every family, and that there's a shortage of lactation help after discharge ESPECIALLY in rural areas, just to name a few issues.

We need to bring awareness to the fact many doctors providing care to families are not versed enough in lactation and are failing at providing the appropriate referrals and guidance to their patients.

We need to fight to get the mammary gland and lactation legitimized as a sub-specialty of medicine in the same way that any other body part and function has trusted and recognized medical specialists.

What we don't need to be doing is putting energy into fighting this losing battle against the Fed is Best foundation because, at the end of the day, parents are going to gravitate to where they feel most supported.

If we're not providing that safe place for families, then shame on us.